Invincible!!!!

I just woke up from a dream and I had a weird dream.  There were only bit of here and there about the dream that i remembered. But, please don laugh…k?…but i think it would be hard…

In this dream, I was dating with George O’malley (of all the guys in Grey’s)…Not really dating tho,but he was actually going after me…(-.-)lll***sweat***

and then together with Addison Shepherd and Preston Burke and the other two person which i cant remember, we were going on a holiday…(donno where!!!)

I was driving a car and guess wat?? everywhere we went, it was flooding!!!(-.-)lll
And i can remember driving through all that water by steping on the brake and accelerator at the same time(someone thought me this, n surprisingly i can remember very well) as to generate the engine more so that the water won’t get into the exhaust…

Ok..then we reached somewhere where i saw lots of "ppl-riding-on-turkey"…then i was throwing a tantrum to George as he told me that our holiday is to ride on turkey…I was very mad at him cos he promised to take me somewhere else…

Then, i forgot how the dream went on or how the dream ended…I felt very very tired when i woke up n i felt so unbelievable…dating with George O’malley??? OK,not dating…but hallucinating that George is going after me???(-.-)lll***lots and lots of sweat*** I know u guys will be laughing ur heads off now…but, i always believe that dreams that i can remember won be real…but, it is definitely bugging me…why in the world did i dream of that???

Arghhhh…maybe i had been watching too much of grey’s recently…about 20 episodes in 3 days…i guess it’s too much….~~sigh~~~

and by the way, for those who never watch grey’s anatomy…
George O’malley is a surgical intern serving in Seattle Grace’s Hospital. He’s….errrr….honest-looking<–(suppose to be a good point right??), hardworking and definitely *smart (^.^) but…oh man!!!he cant be the type of guy that i like…cant be, right???hmmmmm……wondering……..

nvm…It’s just a dream…
but, it was really funny…(^.^)

Today is the third day!!!I’m going to Batu Pahat again…

Went to many places…

S. K. Seri Medan

Dewan Raya Seri Medan

S.R.J.K Chung Hwa, Seri Medan

The relieving effort was OK but the people i worked with were *thumbs up!!*

Encik Haji Baharin, the leader…

Kak Liza, the OT, Kak Salmah, Kak Hasnah and Kak Ainy, the staffnurses, Encik Ismail, the short and hilarious joker and Encik Yunus, the driver.

I had a great great day with them.

From 8am to 8pm…

The whole trip was full of laughter…

Nice meeting them!!

Thought of the day :

Always wear a smile on ur face and u’ll be surrounded by happiness…

(^.^)

I went jogging with mum just now.

Hutan Bandar is still as before except for a new stable.

A new horse…???

So out of place…

Run… run and run…

My stamina’s deteriorating…

Haih…gotta train up lah….

But then, I realised something…

I hate the sound of foot steps…

Especially those that come from behind and became louder and louder n became constant after sometime…

It’s like someone’s following u…tailing u…

I’d rather u run faster a bit and cut in front of me…

I’d rather i slow down and let u run past me…

I’d rather i run faster and shove u off far far away…

I really dislike the feeling of someone running behind me constantly…

Ish… What a weird feeling…

But, i still like jogging…

(^.^)

    Took one day off…Stayed at home and watched 10 episodes of Grey’s Anatomy…It feels so good after recharging cos it was really too much to bear on the second day.

    I actually went to Kota Tinggi on the second day of my volunteering work. Tagged along 4 pro counsellors. Felt  so enthu along the journey cos this time we’ll be going to Hospital Kota Tinggi to visit the staffs.

    When we finally arrived Kota Tinggi town, I was shocked by the condition of the shop houses and their surroundings. The water level mark were still visible on the wall, wall glasses smashed, electrical appliances at the corridor, spoilt computers covered by mud and lots of dirty furnitures. I can’t define or imagine the real impact of the flood. It had caused tremendous destruction to them.

    We were greeted warmly by the staffs of hospital while we arrived. A ccounsellor from Hospital Seremban, Mr. Raju was giving a briefing. All the staffs look OK.They chatted and laughed among themselves. Next up was group counselling. They were divided into smaller groups (around 8 in each group) and leaded by one of the 4 counsellor that i mentioned just now. I followed Ms.See’s group. Thinking that i could be her Co(helper) but i was wrong. Things started out ok when Ms. See asked them to initroduce themselves and most of them were staff nurses and low-rank workers(Pekerja Rendah Awam). I thought ok, it’s not going to be that bad as they looked as if they could handle their emotions well!! But, they began to pour out their grievances and sadness after being prompted by Ms. See. One staffnurse started crying and telling her bitterness. Her stress and negative emotions  that she had faced all through the past 1 and a half month. Honestly, I was lost and dumb-struck. I didnt know wat to do and since then i kept quiet cos i don know wat is the right thing to say. I’m scared that my words will hurt even more. I’m scared that my gesture will create bigger trouble. Even my facial expressions, I’ve to be careful of wat i put on my face. It makes difference as vulnerable beings are most sensitive…Then, I sat there quietly n observe wat Ms. See is going to do. Things started to pop up in my mind. Calmly, she did a lot of reflection, legitimation, all the skills where we learned in BS. Empathy and letting them know that we can understand is of utmost important. After the first one had cry, subsequently there were more who broke down when they began to tell what they had undergo during the flood. OMG, it was hell for me cos I really cant stand ppl crying. For ppl who know me well enough, u know that i’m a cry-baby.When i see ppl crying, i may cry and cry even worse than the ppl crying originally. So, I was there, sitting straight and try to "tahan"…All i could do was to give them the tissue i brought…

    What was that that made them cry? I think what matters most was not the physical part but the mental and emotional part. They suffer from loss of place to stay, food to eat and damage of possessions. They were being called and forced to work too as the hospital was packed with warded patients.  They felt pressurised and stressed. They were not able to handle both personal and work issues. Dilemma…!!!Yeah…I think that’s the word…Dilemma can kill a person.

    Ms. See handled the group well. She let each member to express their feelings and this made them feel very much better after that. She also told them that watever things tat was revealed during the counselling were to remain confidential. She then ended the session with asking them to line up and massaging the front person. It made them laugh heartily tho… I was so happy to see that!!!=)=)

    Joining the flood relief team, I thought i was able to help. But, now i guess all i could do was just helping physically. As for the emotional part, I still gotta learn a lot from the pro counsellors to do counselling. I can only listen to them and sometimes it needs energy to listen too especially listening tothe negative things. I have to keep on telling myself, be strong chia huan, be energetic!!so that u could spread the spirit to them and also let them feel that the future is bright!!There were times when i’m burnt out..But, after recharging i guess i can endure more in the future!!!

Salute to the healthcare workers…
I learnt a lot….
"Soften ur heart, so that u could learn…" quoted from Dr. Htin Aung (^.^)

Look at me
You may think you see
Who I really am
But you’ll never know me
Every day
It’s as if I play a part
Now I see
If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

I am now
In a world where I
Have to hide my heart
And what I believe in
But somehow
I will show the world
What’s inside my heart
And be loved for who I am

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection
Someone I don’t know?
Must I pretend that I’m
Someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

There’s a heart that must be
Free to fly
That burns with a need to know
The reason why

Why must we all conceal
What we think, how we feel?
Must there be a secret me
I’m forced to hide?
I won’t pretend that I’m
Someone else for all time
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

    First time waking up at 7am since i came back to JB.I have to report to the director of Hospital Permai at 8am. What was in my mind? I think i was quite anxious and curious because i do not know wat was waiting for me. WIll I be able to help them? Will I be able to relieve their stress? Will I be able to bring them back as before?

    Yup!!I joined the flood relief team in Hospital Permai.We were supposed to console and counsel the flood victims. Y on earth did i end up in such activity? At first, I was quite reluctant to go cos it was all decided by my dad before i have a chance to make my own choice. But after thinking, I told myself to give it a try.We won know wat would it be like until we try right?

    The first place that i will be going is SK Parit Raja, Batu Pahat.Before pushing off, we had a short meeting with Dr. Banjamin Chan which is the hospital director. He told us to handle those victims carefully as some of them were suffering from Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder.(^.^) this sounds familiar right?I think we learned it somewhere in BS lectures…Dr.Chan also asked us to prompt the victims to express their emotions. This is because by revealing their problems to us, it can help to relax their mind. We need to tell them how to handle current situations also because there were victims which became paranoid after the flood. They began to shift their things out of the house when it’s only drizzling. This is not very healthy as they wont be able to lead their normal daily routine anymore. So, after the short meeting, it was decided that 9 of us will be going to Batu Pahat. The team consists of Mr. Aru, the team leader, 5 staffnurses, 2 OT(Occupational Therapist) and I(the unexperienced one)=pYay!! Off we go…

    After 2 hours journey, we reached SK Parit Raja finally. I felt so lost and helpless when i saw the whole primary school filled with 360+ families and 1700+ victims in total. I really dont know wat to do and where to start.Then, the OT told me that they had prepared things to have a colouring contest for the children. Ok!!I decided to start with something easy…Handling the kids… It was great. The kids were quite stable and can do the colouring well enough. I get to talk to the kids while they were colouring. They seem to know well about wat had happened to their homes. There were only a few of them felt worried about their possessions which were lost in the flood.

    In the afternoon, we started off with motivating the kids. This was conducted by some professional counsellors from Hospital Serdang. As the group was too big, I was asked to help in leading the kids under 12. Ok…I was shocked as i donno wat to do again. My mind was blank. All sorts of reactions from the kids started to pop up in my mind…Would there be someone who break down in the middle of my discussions?But then, I told myself to be as casual as I can and try to chat with them…and yes!!It worked…The kids were willing to share their experiences and also tell me a little bit about them. I ended the session by motivating them and telling them to persevere in achieving their ambitions and dreams. The smile on their faces told me that I did well..(^.^)

    After that, I went into the hall to talk to a few makciks. Before this, Mr.Aru told me that there’s nothing much that we could do now. We cannot give any promises. We cannot solve anything for them too. All we can do is to prompt them to tell us wat’s in their mind and we have to listen patiently. hmm…I think i can do that well tho…According to Mr. Aru, some of them might seem ok in front of us. But they may be putting up a brave front just to cover their fear.So, I was taught to do stress evaluative test by asking them all sorts of questions.hmm…I think i was not prepared to ask those questions yet.. So, I guess i will just start off with chatting with them first.Yay!!!It went well…I made a few friends over there. They were very willing to tell me about themselves and wat happened to their homes.

    There was one makcik who is a single mother. She have to work as a cleaner to feed the family. She also have to take care of her mentally-ill child.She was also suffering from hypertension. I felt sorry for her. But, what amazed me most is that she accepted wat had happened to her. She said it was all challenges by God. Life is not going to be smooth-sailing all the time. All she can do is accept them and live with it. I was so happy about her spirit.

    After talking to a few of them, most of them are suffering  from insomnia which i guess is a typical symptom of stress patients. They are worried about their flooded homes. They have to adapt to the condition in the relief centres. and most devastating was how on earth are they going to clean up their houses after the flood is subside?All the problems come in a combo. i guess it takes a strong will and heart to face this kind of disasters.

    I reached home at around 8 pm with a tired body but a stronger mind. I learned a lot from the staffs, the counsellors and the victims too. I thought i would be helping the victims, but instead of that i actually learned something from them.

Thought of the day :
When we give to others, we actually gain something from them without knowing.

Something to  look forward to…

=)

=)

I’ll be doing volunteering work tomorrow…

Strengthen my mind…

Strengthen my body…

Strenghthen my faith…

So that, I can help…

I can lend a hand to those who need…

Chia Huan…Do not be discouraged…

You can do it…!

With the courtesy of Cheems, Wei Cheong and Sidney, around 15 of us went all around Penang for 4 whole days…

Fun and Fruitful…That’s all  i can say about the trip…

Y fun?

It is because i actually get to sit in a kembara and kept on laughing at the driver as the driver was really funny lah…But, thanks for showing us around penang…and honestly, the way u introduced the buildings and tourists sites were really funny…and i get to ride on a Jetski for the first time. I liked it very very much. I’ll definitely do it again next time.

Y fruitful?

I think i should put it "full"…haha…Those who went with us will know.We actually eat around 5-6 meals a day. On the first day, we went to "Genting" hawker centre for their Char Kuay Teow and Indian Rojak and Chee Cheong Fun, Ayer Itam for Penang Laksa, Another Hawker Centre for Char Kuay Teow, and a shop named "mud tou yau" which means "having everything". The shop sells desserts basically consisting of everything.

On the second day, we start off our food trip with Dim Sum…Yummy egg tarts and chicken feet…OMG, I missed the egg tarts lah…Can u imagine crispy  pastry and slurpy smooth filling…OMG…Then, we continued with visits to all the temples in Penang, Guan Yin Temple, Khoo Kongsi, before we stopped to eat again.haha!!It’s the famous Cendol Stall…Yummy Cendol…with only Rm 1.20, I have a bowl of Sweet soup with lots of cendol, atapci and big big red beans…OMG, How am I going to slim down after all the Santan and Sugar changed into TG for storage in my fat tissues?~sob sob~…By the way, who cares..?=p  Eat first lah…Then, we continue our journey to visit Burmese Temple and the botanical garden. Finally, we went to Batu Ferringhi where i played Jet Ski…^.^ Yay!!! After that, we went to another street with hawker stalls which is famous again for its Char Kuay teow.Then we went home to bathe before we came out again for the famous Prawn Noodle in New Green House?(did i remember correctly?)haha…nvm…then we went to Si bu Qiao which is famous for donno wat…cos wherever the hawker centre we went, all the food are nice..<–according to Yeap ^.^ There, we tried the Popiah with soup..cannot imagine right? U have to try it to know it lah…ok..

On the third day, we went to penang hill. Before that, we went to Lorong Selamat which is famous for its Char Kuay Teow and Ais Kacang with peanut Ice cream!!!yay!!!=)…hmmm…Did u realise how many Char Kuay teow were mentioned in my post?Can u imagine how many Char Kuay Teow we had during our trip?No reasons..Because all the stalls sell good Char Kuay Teow…Jackie was the one who tried all the Char Kuay Teow and Cheems said if we take all the Kuay Teow eaten by Jackie and arrange them along the road can reach Mentakab from Penang…-_-lll….<–joke of the day…Oh ya…The peanut ice cream was yummy…!!!=)Ok…where did i stop?Ok…We were going to Penang hill right?The scenery is breathtaking and the weather up on the hill was a lot more cooler than the town area which is probably 39-40 with the scorching sun shining cruelly on us…By the way, I like the weather..hehe=P…at night, we get to go back and bathe before we pushed off to Teluk Kumbar for Seafood…8 dishes…8person…so in the end, 8 bloated stomach…haha…after that, we went to stroll around penang.Thanks to WC cos i get to visit Penang Free School..One of the oldest school in Malaysia..Isnt that something worth visiting?hummphh..Jackie…stop laughing at me when i was amused by all the schools in penang…u made me feel like a weirdo tho… maybe u are just a boring guy who doesnt know how to appreciate "learning instituitions"…haha…=P…But i admit, Penang Free School looks a bit eerie at 1am in the morning..hehe…OH ya…I forgot something again…We actually went for another meal before we visited Penang  Free School..The famous Aki Pancake…selling pancakes with all sorts of filling…u can have peanut butter+banana+cheese or even Turkey+cheese+egg…over 50+ combinations for u to choose…After that, we wanted to go mamak and have a chat but we ended up in the biggest Mcd in Penang cos all the mamak were packed with ppl…can u imagine?

In the end, We will be going back to KL with a stomach full of Char Kuay Teow, Ais Kacang and all the nice nice food in Penang…With a mind full of faith cos we actually went to almost all the temples in Penang…hehe…=P

On friday, which was the last day of our trip, we took 10 am bus back to KL…Reluctantly….going to get results….

Thanks to Cheems for letting us stay at ur place…
Thanks to wei cheong, Cheems and Sidney for bringing us around Penang…
Thank you…..

My blog has been idle for a long long time…Have been asked by many friends how come never update…!!!Sorry… friends…I have been very busy with the most important exam in IMU..the "killer" EOS 3…Now that the exam’s over and holiday has started, I have all the time in this world to do what i wanna do…So, I decided to write a "short" summary about my life for the past one month…

*****Studies*****

What can be more stressful if u have to finish 200 over lecture notes in 1 month and remember them all?Plus, u have to practice CSU and even look at all those pathological pictures…Ok…First of all, we did manage to finish the lecture notes but i don think any of us remember all the contents…-.-lll..cos these were the faces that i saw on most of my friends when we stepped out from MPH on day 1 after SAQ paper…As for the pathological FLMs, hmmm….medicine is definitely not for smart ppl…it’s about hardwork and memorising power…how well can u memorise a picture when u had only 1 year’s knowledge that u cant really understand what’s wrong with the "watever organ" given to u..so all u can do is memorise the picture as how the picture appears to u…Remember the blue shirt that boy with a swollen face so that u won answer "Chagas’s disease or Romana’s sign" for "Burkitt’s Lymphoma"…ishhhh…-.-lll…For the first time, I stared at the "immuno table" which was left empty for me to fill in all those "alien CD4 and CD8"…Is there something wrong with the question or is there something wrong with me???ISHHHHH…again….Next up is OSCE where we have 40 seconds to read a question and the next 5 minutes to perform a physical examination with a "fake patient" and a "stern" examiner in a room not more than 2mX4m…It’s like those circus performer who have to deal with a tiger or lion in a cage…Imagine the feeling…My OSCE can be considered as OK except that i felt so stupid after bring conned by an examiner…Ish….I must remember Mcburney’s point is "MEDIAL 2/3rd and LATERAL 1/3rd"….Remember chia huan…..-.-lll….But, I am still very very =)=) cos the exams are over…Now, we’re just waiting for D-day which is the results releasing day…Pray  hard that everything is going to go on smoothly…

*****Friends*****

Have not been able to keep in touch with my secondary school friends lately because of the exams…They were having long holidays while i had to mug like hell in KL…now that i’m having my holidays and they resume theirr studies…I really wonder when can i get to meet them…WONDER….

Once there was a friend who told me that i’m one who thinks a lot…My mind is always running like mad…here and there..haha…wondering is it good or bad…but i think as long as the "angel" won or even if the "angel" and "devil" in me are "draw" after a rambling match, things won end up too bad after all…But, honestly, i hate the feeling of dilemma…So, there are most of the time when i don wanna make any decision and just step back and out of the match…and go running…cos i know there will be others there…able to make me feel comfortable…hope so…

Guess i have been listening to quite a number of friends’ problems…just listening…hope i really get to help u guys…i will really try my best…good training for me as a future doctor i guess…upholding my principles and confidentiality…If i really cant help at least i can listen..that’s the best i could do before i come out with a real "fuiyoh…." solution…hahaha….perasan betul…who?who ar?…"ok….i’m going to annouce it in the atrium!!!"….It’s my blog…I can write wat i wanna write even tho i know u won understand…cheh…later i go out kena belasah also donno y…maybe i donno anything.. i just wanna act like i know a lot….Sh**…Chia Huan…wake up from ur dreams lah….crapping…-.-lll

As  a whole, happy holidays my IMU friends and happy studying for my other friends who are studying…=)

*****Family*****

Haih…sometimes it’s quite depressing to think of the problems which are occuring continuously…I just pray hard and hope that everything will be as before soon…

But, I’m still glad to always see my mum and dad bickering with each other when i’m back…the family is still my home sweet home with some "spices and sauces" in it sometimes…haha…

In the end…Chia Huan is still =) =)

Yay!!!